justin adler, blog, buenos aires, bahia blanca, university of arizona, brooklyn, basketball, travel, paul mcpherson

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

¨Make sure it´s not wack¨

I am about two weeks into my travels.

Some places have been very nice.

Some places have been very lame.

The only reason of this post is to let you know there will not be any more posts until late December or early January when I drop a string of posts that will make up a book of my travels.

In the mean time I´m going to keep traveling, keep exploring and continue to heed Dame Dash´s advice as I document my journey.

Chau.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Gone

Begining tonight I leave on my epic journey through Argentina.

Honestly I am pretty fucking nervous, but hopefully everything will work out.

If I do die, three half-written WPM posts will automatically publish randomly in 2009. Then hopefully other bloggers can sample my blogs in some Pac-esque like manner.

While I am gone I will miss three key dates. The two-year anniversary of WPM, which is some time in November, the leak of The Blueprint 3 (please do not e-mail me anything about this album until I get back), and most importantly, the epic December 11 match-up of Brandon Jennings versus Ricky Rubio (please e-mail me every related article and video you kind find about the game).

I have no idea how often I wil update the blog, time will tell.

In the mean time I guess all we can do is hope Paul McPherson starts a blog called "Where´s Justin Adler?"

Pictures


Above, in an effort to relate everything back to rap music in one way or another, there's the king of ARG.

Below, some funky art studio.


I like this picture because I didn't even know somebody took it. Note: Laura doesn't normally dress like this, it was part of some weird family room photo shoot that was going on.


This is a photo of me dancing after I found out I graduated.


Here's the twin towers of Palermo.

A train, some trash and some clouds.


I hate the way the bitch in the purple sweater killed this photo. I supposed I could have waited 30 seconds for her to cross the street and get out of the photo, but instead I will just forever hate her. This door was my landmark to get off the bus. It's near the 93-stop two blocks from my house. Seeing as how this is two blocks from my house, I suppose I could go retake the picture, but instead I'll just continue hate that random woman.

A dope frame shop near my place. When I was taking these pictures the employee was playing a very polyphonic cell phone version of Usher's "Yeah." That made me happy.



This is Ateneo, what I've been told is the biggest bookstore in South America. I don't believe it. It was still pretty cool and quite relaxing to just listen to Sinatra and read some books.


So relaxing that the guy next to me fell asleep for 45 minutes.

I like this building.


I like this graffiti.

Monday, October 13, 2008

Parents 4.0


Wednesday started out a little rough. My date for the night sent me a Skype message to let me know she was flaking out on me and I was still to much of a pussy to ask out my roommate Laura.

Somehow over three months of living with Laura I have fallen in love with her. There are a few million amazing things about her and it has also became my new goal in life to gain as many national citizenships as possible through marriage. I feel the exchange of a United States and Colombia legal citizenship would greatly benefit both our lives.

Back to Wednesday, which was an odd day in that it actually had a plan attached with the day. I had a lunch set up with Wayne and Susan, my newest set of parents.

I met Wayne and Susan a month ago at a South American Explorers Club soiree. The South American Explorers Club is a club ran by ex-Pats who decided that living in the Bay Area or Boulder, Colorado just wasn't hippie enough for them. Once a month they have a wine and sangria soiree to try to get new members.

After my friend Dan and I were five glasses of wine deep, we decided maybe we should branch out and start talking to other people and that is how I met Wayne and Susan.

We exchanged contact information, agreed to get together later on and all I remember was they said something about buying me a beer.

Although I feared hanging out with two 50-year-olds would be awkward, it ended up being a great time and it almost felt like I was hanging out with a much more liberal version of my own parents. We met again the day after I graduated and they ended up buying me a nice lunch as a graduation gift.

A couple more weeks passed and I got an e-mail from them proposing a free lunch for some basic Spanish lessons.

I met them Wednesday afternoon and we ended up hanging out all day. They bought me a great lunch, complete with beer and dessert, and then I invited them over to my place so they could try mate for their first time. Afterward I showed off Palermo Hollywood and ended up hanging out at their place for a few hours.

We discussed how fucked up the world is and they got behind my plan to move to Canada, mainly to take advantage of their socialized health care. I then realized that my biggest problem would be obtaining citizenship and the legal right to work.

Then it just popped in my head. My friend Spencer is a Canadian citizen. I could quickly throw together a sham gay marriage and be in Toronto in no time. Wayne and Susan thought this was genius.

Five minutes later I realized I could even marry one of Spencer's sisters and it would have the same effect and be less gay. Or I could marry Spencer's 900-year-old grandma and I could be a Canadian citizen with a very funny story to tell.

"She's been married like five times, she probably wouldn't even notice," Spencer said after I proposed to him and/or his sisters via Skype.

Aside from teaching me a ton on life there is a lot of other cool shit about Wayne and Susan. Wayne has the great story of having some 1 in a billion eye disease that may or may not make him blind in a few years, hence their exploration of the world while he can still see it (I'm not sure that actually qualifies as "cool shit.") Plus he has taught me a ton on global economics.

I hate to say this is my favorite thing about Susan, but she actually knows who Karrine "Superhead" Steffans is and she's read "Confessions of a Video Vixen."

I naturally bring up Superhead any time Bill Maher's name comes into conversation, because their (now expired) relationship still baffles me to this day and Superhead went to my high school.

They also both attended last year's Burning Man Festival.

Wayne and Susan are the newest set on my list of parents, which includes my bio-parents, step parents, Gail and Jay Rochlin (a UA journalism professor who let me house-sit/ live with his wife and him in the summer of 2007), and now Wayne and Susan.

Despite the fact that I often engage in activities that I don't think any eight of my parents would be proud of, I like to think that having four sets of parents will help me stay on some of what of a right track, even if the track weaves through remote regions of Argentina.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Analogies


I had high expectations before I ever saw Kevin Durant play a game of basketball. My friends had talked of him as some athletic freak. I'd read a few Bill Simmons' columns, where Bill would pen 700 words jerking off to Durant. Then I actually saw him play when Texas played Gonzaga in the U.S. Airways Center. He looked terrible as his forced terrible shots and looked like he had no idea how to run an offense. I'm sure Kevin Durant is a very good player, but I'll always think he sucks.

I had high expectations before I ever read a book by Ernest Hemingway. My friend talked of him as some literary god. I'd read a few other articles, where some blogger would pen 700 words jerking off to Hemingway. Then I actually read Hemingway's "The Old Man and the Sea." It was terrible, it never went any where and it looked like Hemingway had no idea how to write an entertaining story. I'm sure Ernest Hemingway is a very good writer, but I'll always think he sucks.

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I'll never forget walking around in tide pools when I was younger. With all the waves crashing and jagged rocks there was a certain element of danger, but there was still so much more that was fascinating. I wouldn't touch most of the sea creatures, because they looked scary and I didn't want to disturb them. But I always touched the sea anemones because I liked to watch them quickly close up around my finger. The fact that they are oblivious to so much going around them and they still survive because food just happens to fall into them will forever amaze me.

I'll never forget walking around in the subway when I was in Buenos Aires. With all the pick-pocketers and shady people there was a certain element of danger, but there was still so much more that was fascinating. I wouldn't touch most of the homeless people, because they looked scary and I didn't want to disturb them. But I always gave a coin to the blind homeless people because I liked to watch their empty palm quickly close up around the coin. The fact that they are oblivious to so much going around them and they still surive because money for food just happens to fall into their hands will forever amaze me.

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I constantly alludes to cocaine with my Colombian friend. She always gets upset and tells me that I am not funny. It's a problem for her country, especially the youth, that she's not proud of at all. She explained that not many people in her country actually use cocaine and those who do, are looked down upon. She is embarrassed that her country produces and exports a drug which hurts so many people worldwide. I know a lot of people who still chose to use cocaine and are part of the problem.

My Colombian friend constantly alludes to shows on MTV. I always get upset and tell her that she is not funny. It's a problem for my country, especially the youth, that I'm not proud of at all. I explained that not many people in my country actually watch "The Hills" and those who do, are looked down upon. I am embarrassed that my country produces and exports such stupidty which dumbs down so many people worldwide. She and her friends still chose to watch every episode of "The Hills" and be a part of the problem.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Brainstorm


Sorry for the lack of blogs as of late, I've just been too busy enjoying my last week in Buenos Aires.

This coming Tuesday is opening night of the Justin Adler versus Argentina two-month showdown.

I'll expand more on the match-up later, but right now I need your help coming up with some radical ideas for my excursion.

I met this guy the other day who already raised the bar by taking a 50-hour cargo boat ride from Iguazu to Paraguay just so he could try to find the only Hezbollah/Al-Queda training ground in the western hemisphere. The rest of his story is pretty nuts as it included the line, "Would you feel better or worse about yourself if you were buying weed from a mother in front of her two children?"

He also just graduated NYU Law and is only here to enjoy the last free time he'll have before he starts working 80-hour weeks.

Keep in mind I'm rolling on a very limited budget and I will be staying Argentina/Chile the entire time because I don't have the money to buy visas to all the other countries.

My tentative ideas:

-- Completely abandon the concept of time. No cell phones. No watches. If I need to catch a bus, I can just buy the ticket then and there and take it to my next destination.

-- I am going to remove myself from all news media. Instead of waking up every day and reading a few newspapers, I plan on practicing Zen and meditating to start every day.

-- Try to completely remove myself from all familiar elements and only eat food I have never ate before and try to forget the English language.

Please shoot me any more ideas you have by Tuesday morning as I will have limited to no internet access after that.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

Mezcla de mierda


Here's a bunch of random notes I've been hanging on to for the past two weeks...

-- Since I have been in Buenos Aires I've latched on to the study abroad program that Matt and Erasmo belong to. I feel like that kid who is not really in the frat, but somehow is at every party.

A couple weeks ago I finally met their cultural coordinator Valentina, who may have one of the greatest jobs in the world. Her job consists of finding interesting activities in the city and getting all the kids to come along, which seems simple enough, until you realize she invites all her friends which always throws off the plans.

She told her program to meet her at the planetarium. She ended up showing up an hour late and all we eventually didn't make it to the planetarium because we lost track of time while sitting in a circle in the park playing guitar and drinking mate.

Valentina is also ridiculously cute and when I first met her she was wearing a Calgary Flames t-shirt. I'm a huge sucker for girls wearing obscure sports apparrel and I think now is the time in the blog when I should present my list of the three hottest girls I have seen in real life.

3. The girl who once came into my former employer Blue Point wearing a
Miikka Kiprusoff jersey.

2. Valentina in her Calgary Flames t-shirt.

1. The nutso cute blonde girl in my freshman TRAD 101 class who wore a Marquis Daniels Nike swingman shirt.

Total words exchanged with all three girls: less than 20.

-- Last time I went to my Art through Science and technology course, the teacher brought up 9/11 being a conspiracy. Still nobody said anything, which kept his record intact of six straight weeks of no class participation.

-- I've been adjusting my "Fast & Furious" quotes to my surroundings. Now I normally say, "I live my life a quarter-kilometer at a time."

-- My roommates were watching some MTV award show and I almost lost my mind. I began ranting about how MTV was destroying America's youth and how all their celebrities are famous for no reason. Then as I was entering the third minute of my rant and discussing how MTV is worse for children than hardcore pornography, T.I. came on the screen.

I then told everyone to be quiet so I could pay attention to T.I.

T.I. talked for two minutes and from my count said four proper English words. The rest of the time he was mumbling southern swang about his stuntastic red velvet coat.

Then I left the room because I didn't have the necessary energy to argue that T.I. was better than anyone else on MTV.

-- I'd like to see the New York Times online reader patterns and find out if I'm the only one who read Thomas Friedman's newest op-ed, then read the full review of T.I.'s last concert.

-- I have no idea what the picture at the top of the post has to do with anything, but I love it.

-- Here's when I realized that maybe I'm getting into this retirement thing too much:

My brother: "Do you work out a lot?"

Me: "No, but I do a lot of walking."

-- I'll keep him anonymous, but one of my friends once said "Everything every man does on Facebook is just an attempt to get laid."

My Facebook religious views read: "Sonny Vaccaro," which I meant to be a subtle diss at UA basketball fans, a complex statement on my thoughts on religion and an even more complex attempt at getting laid.

I can probably count on one hand the number of my Facebook friends who know who Sonny is, but somehow, some way this transpired.

1 new friend request -- from Lila Iglesias (Argentina networkd) -- no friends in common -- little on her info -- I still accept -- I compose message:

hola,

como me conoces? Estoy muy curiouso.

chau,
justin

++++

I receive message:

Hola! No te conozco, puse Sonny Vaccaro y apareciste! Entonces te agregué

;)

Beso

++++

I reply:

Lila,

Esto es muy loco, estas una afficionada de Sonny Vacaro.

Como conoces Sonny Vaccaro? Ahora tengo mucho curiosidad porque nadie conoce Sonny Vaccaro.

-justin

++++

Response:

Cómo que nadie lo conoce?? Si es un genio!!

++++

(I call my friend Dustin to confirm this isn't an elaborate hoax)

Lila,

Estamos hablando sobre el mismo Sonny Vaccaro de EeUu quien trabaja en el mundo de basket? Estas una gran affcionada de basket? Como conoces Sonny Vaccaro, este es re, re loco.

++++

Sisí, mi papá mira mucho basket, entonces desde que soy chiquita miro con él! Él es un fanático y me está convirtiendo, jajaa
¿Estás viviendo en Argentina?

++++

After a few more conversations, I learn she lives in some small town outside of Buenos Aires, maybe I'll run into her on my Argentine travels. I figure best case scenario: we talk about basketball, fornicate, maybe get married and get Sonny as the best man.

Worst case scenario: It's Dustin's most amazing prank ever and I don't live this down until I die.

-- Speaking of Sonny... I'll leave you with these two articles so you can remind yourself yet again that Brandon Jennings is infinitely cooler than you will ever be.

Family keeps teenage pro grounded

Plotting new path to NBA, via Europe