Dream team dreams

--I came home from school Friday walked in the kitchen and dropped the biggest "Ay Dios mio!" of my life. Unexpectedly a microwave sat on our kitchen table. This is huge because living without out a microwave has been a mild inconvenience and even though every day I'm accosted by children under 12 begging for a peso or two, the fact that I've had to re-heat my steak on a hot plate has made me the real victim in Buenos Aires.

Of course I was kind of enjoying not using a microwave because I figured one day back in the States I could bring up the fact that I lived five months of my life without a microwave and somehow this would get me pussy. Of course if I'm delusional to believe a girl will be sleep with me for the sheer fact that she's amazed I endured five months without a novelty kitchen appliance, I could just pretend I never got the microwave and lie to a broad at a party, but at the end of the day it's going to be very hard to bring up food re-heating methods in any social scene.

--Choripan is this amazing sandwich in Buenos Aires that is bread and some kind of sausage that is filled with amazingness. The other day while watching the street vendor cook mine I noticed his secret recipe. As he stood there grilling the sausage he pulled his half-smoked cigarrette out of the coals that were cooking my choripan. He took one final drag, then flicked the butt into the street. It was the best choripan I've had in Buenos Aires. What they don't tell you in the those retarded Truth ads is that cigarrette smoke greatly enhances most South American sausages.

--I know there's nothing gayer or more boring than hearing about someone else's dreams, but last night I dreamed I was chosen by some secret government agency to travel via slides to the center of the Earth, again I was without Brendan Fraser, so I knew if shit went down I would be screwed (I never thought I'd need Brendon Fraser so much).

While sliding down to the center of the Earth I would stop at different levels just to check shit out. I clearly remember being at the near the outer core and encountering the 2008 USA Olympic basketball team. While talking to Amare Stoudemire (who isn't even on the team) I woke up. End lame dream talk.

--I read the other day that Suns season ticket holders will have troubles getting tickets to the 2009 All Star Game because the NBA takes so many tickets for their sponsors, which scares the shit out of me because I need to go to All-Star Saturday night or the game. So if any of you out there reading plan on having a connect for tickets please let me know. I'm giving you a 5-month warning.

--Speaking of things I need, does anybody have a product key code for Microsoft Office 2007? I'll Paypal you some money if you want. Or you could just hook it up for free and I'll give you a free 50x50-pixel ad on Wherespmac.

--It's really bizarre to listen to my great Dutch friend talk with my Colombian friends because they use the word "great" in every sentence. It's nice being around such positive people and I hope they realize that although I don't say "great" as often as them I'm doing my part by eating two bowls of Frosted Flakes every day.

--I've started to write WPM posts in my notebook because some times when I'm in the city I'll think of something noteworthy that I know I'll forget five minutes later. So don't be surprised this holiday season if you get an original 1 of 1 WPM hand-written draft, because after this trip I probably won't have enough money to get anybody anything else.

--The shopping carts at the market have 4 wheels that can all turn 360 degrees therefore enabling me to drift around every aisle. I'm now the DK of supermercado shopping.

--Before I left I asked those close to me to please make sure nothing happens to Bernie Mac while I'm in Buenos Aires. Then after being here for not even three weeks I find out he's dead. What the fuck. Could you guys at least watch after the other three original kings of comedy.

--Now Isaac Hayes is dead too. Come on.

--Finally I found this online and I've now changed my BsAs goal from attending a Boca game to being there for this (40 second mark of video below).