Still looking for P-Mac

There are many of you who are either too dedicated to Where's P-Mac, too lazy or too retarded to read my stuff over at goazcatsblog.com. Read that shit please, I post at least twice a week and every now and then I'll post a gem like "All eyes on 3," where I am able to come up with a title that connects 'Pac and Brandon Jennings and throw down a sick Jennings interview. Where else can you read Jennings talking about people crying who can't get on the 18-year-old's bandwagon?

I hope you all understand that selling out in the blogosphere is the cool thing to do and switching blogs is a completely acceptable practice. Henry Abbot is balling at True Hoop, so is the Mighty MJD, Bethlehem Shoals, and the nine million other bloggers that AOL's FanHouse stole from their original blogs.

Even if you don't like Arizona basketball, which is completely understandable since it's going nowhere fast, read the blog as I try to make it as WPM-ish as I can.

Also I'd like to take this time to thanks life-long Bears fan and Fry's customer Alex Spicker for inspiring me to keep WPM updated. I'm sure if Alex had the opportunity he would encourage everyone to bank at Wells Fargo and only use words with one meaning.

Now let's get to some oldschool WPM shit, that I've had in my head for the past month or so...

First for these lame motherfuckers who are supporting the wrong McPherson.

I went up to these masked men on the UA mall and told them that they could spew their bullshit to me as long as I could get a picture of their silly sign.

Turns out they are a group of people wasting their lives by protesting Scientology. I refuse to even give them the satisfaction of Googling Lisa or linking to their shit, but they basically told me that Lisa McPherson was an old, rich white lady, who gave a ton of money to Scientology then got cancer.

Instead of taking Lisa to a hospital and using conventional medicine the broad was ironically killed by the very church she had supported for the better part of her life.

"They said they were taking her to a hospital, but instead they drove her 100 miles in the other direction and took to a house where they denied her food or water," the masked idiots told me. "She died of dehydration and cockroaches ate her dead body to the bone."

It was tough not to laugh at these people and it was even tougher to understand what they hell they were doing. By the time I write this blog a couple thousand Africans will have contracted AIDS, a few more thousand people will have been raped and killed, and there are a couple million more things wrong with the United States. But these people chose to spend their time protesting Scientology because one woman who was part of the church died from it?

Umm... OK... Find a real cause then come back and bother me.

Second order of business...
Somehow I my television watching has declined sharply in that I don't even watch anything on TV besides syndicated Seinfeld and Scrubs marathons, but Summer Heights High has been consuming a lot of my time recently.

It's a brilliant mockumentary of an Australian high school. It's shot like The Office and has one guy playing three characters like Da Ali G Show. It's created by Chris Lilley, who plays the flamboyant drama teacher Mr. G, the private-schooled, self absorbed teenager Ja'mie King and rebellious student Jonah Takalua. (BT dub all those clips sucked, but I didn't want to ruin that many funny jokes in the show)

The show is fucking genius in many aspects as it mocks a girl who overdosed on ecstasy and has a very strange relationship with mentally retarded children throughout the entire show. It also uses excessive profanity which is a prime qualification to become on of my favorite shows.

It was an 8-episode mini series on the Australian Broadcasting Channel that reportedly will be part of HBO's summer 2008 line-up. I never thought I would be obsessed with TV from Australia and it's neighboring countries, but after Flight of the Concords and Summer Heights High, I am now waiting for Indonesia and the Solomon Islands to step up to the plate and create their own comedic programing to entertain me.

Don't believe the hype

Where's Paul McPherson now presents "Why the Glow in the Dark Tour sucked:"

There was no Glowing, I expected a set like Kanye had at the Grammys, instead the only thing that Glowed on Kanye's set was the sole of his his secret, super-exclusive Nikes, which I'm personally convinced Kanye will never release only to keep a leg up on the general public.

The entire time Kanye was wearing some retarded outfit that was something of a cross between Tupac in the California Love video and Jonathon Taylor Thomas from Home Improvement, basically Mad Max with a red jacket tied around his waste. I kept waiting for Kanye to hit the goofy sleeve on his forearm, which basically looked like Peyton Manning's playbook if it was designed by Pastel, and trigger some kind of glowing effect. It never happened.

Rihanna's set was the only part of the show which fit the title. Rihanna along with her back-up dancers all wore flouresncent outfits which actually appeared to glow, even if it did make Rihanna look like a futuristic stripper. At one point they all spun glowing light-saber like sticks around, which was one of the visual highlights of the show. Even though I only like Rihanna's singles when I'm drunk and I actually consider Lupe, NERD and Ye to be musical geniuses of my generation, Rihanna's set was the best of them all.

Upon leaving the concert my friend and I had this conversation:

"That was just like Space Mountain."

"Really? I've never been on that ride."

"Well, Space Mountain wasn't that corny."

The entire premise of Kanye's set was that his spaceship crashed on some random planet and he had to return to earth. Basically it involved some terribly lame computer generated voice named "Jane" stroking Kanye's ego for an hour.

Yes Kanye's outer-space themed set was cool, no it did not come close to even touching Daft Punk's, which I figured the show would try to copy. Kanye had his chance to have his famous light show tour and join the ranks of Daft Punk or even Pink Floyd, but he didn't even come close. And it's probably complete blasphemy to put Kanye in the same sentence as Pink Floyd, but I've never seen their show or done LSD, so I'd imagine it's something like a Daft Punk show, which was at least 500 times greater than the Glow in the Dark Tour.

The most frustrating element was having Kanye, Pharrell and Lupe in the same building and not seeing any of them collaborate at all. While a CRS performance may have been too much to ask for, would it have killed Kanye to share the spotlight and let Lupe spit his 16 at the end of "Touch the sky?"

Aside from all the visual miscues, the audio part itself was lackluster as there was no background behind the songs, no freestyles, and nothing else to differentiate what was performed from what's in my mp3 player. Basically I could have saved myself some money and listened to the fucking cds, which don't feature a retarded robot talking between every track.

I miss the good ol' days when Kanye shared the stage with John Legend and Israeli-hip hop violinist Miri Ben Ari. Back when Kanye spit freestyles over random beats he did for other artists. Back when the crowd played name that tune as John Legend played the Fugees on his piano and Miri Ben Ari rocked Jadakiss on her violin. Back when Kanye was big-headed, but not big-headed enough to sacrifice a great musical show for a robotic-female saying "we need the biggest superstar in the entire universe to power our spaceship."

Death around the corner

I may die doing this... well at least according to this article which shines a light on the every day struggles of bloggers.

Seriously soon I will post something new, amazing and P-Mac-ish, until then imagine you just read something that was moderately entertaining about Brandon Jennings with a couple of obscure hip-hop references and some links to more amazing shit.

In the mean time, stay up on GOAZCATSBLOG and respect Benny's gangsta.

Also read DC Sports Bog's wrap-up of DeShawn's birthday party. Pure genius. Dan Steinberg is my blog hero.

Finally, "Every day you are practicing how not to die."

In due time

Soon enough I'll update this blog, but most my work has been going into GOAZCATSBLOG, while my search for P-Mac progresses.

I've posted 10 times for my other blog since my last post here. Check them all out here.

Be sure to read about Brandon Jennings' new ink here.

Also check my blog about Lute Olson's summer camp here.

Oh and the above picture has absolutely nothing to do with anything, but AI's face is priceless.

Closer...

Recently a reader from France named Fab informed us that Paul McPherson was playing in his own backyard on the French team Hyères-Toulon. While we now know where Paul McPherson is, the blog will not be complete until I personally interview him.

In the mean time I decided to have a little Q&A with the French P-Mac fan Fab. It's not the best Q&A ever because of the language barrier and some answers were slightly edited to improve their English fluidity.

WPM: How long have you been a basketball fan?

Fab: A very long time.

W: What got you into basketball?

F: I've started to play basketball in 1988.

W: Do you watch the NBA often?

F: Yes, I watch NBA on my TV. But, the games are so late that it's very tough.

W: Who is your favorite NBA player now/of all time?

F: My favorite player is Kobe Bryant but Michael Jordan was the best...

W: What division is Hyères-Toulon in?

F: Hyères-Toulon (HTV) plays in the first division of French league (ProA). It's a good team with good players.

W: Who is your favorite player on Hyères-Toulon and why?

F: My favorite player is Sean Colson. He played with the Houston Rockets and he's the best point guard of the championship. He is a good friend of Paul Mcpherson.
W: Are their games on television?

F: Yeah, on French tv (Sport+). During the competition "Semaine des As", there were a lot of NBA scouts and television stations from all over Europe covering the game. There is a young player named Alexix Ajinca who should play in the NBA next season.

W: I read that Paul McPherson joined the team in December, how effective has he been on the team?

F: He's a good player, but he plays bad. Last week, he scored 21 points. I hope that he could play good to the end of the season.

W: How much playing time does he get?

F: He plays 20 minutes during a game.

W: Has he had any amazing plays for the team?

F: No, he plays slowly. It's crazy because before games, he always shows off with very big dunks.

W: Are there any good Paul McPherson quotes from local media or any good McPherson stories.

Are there any other great, possibly former NBA players in the league?

F: Not really. He has two nicknames in the media. "The Body" and "Godzilla."
Additionally, Bruce Bowen, Tony Parker, Boris Diaw, Mike Pietrus, Johan Petro and Udonis Haslem played in the French league.

Finally here are some dope pics Fab sent me:
Paul 1, Paul 2, Paul 3, Paul 4, Paul 5, Paul 6, Paul 7, Paul 8, Paul 9, Paul 10.

Reasonable Doubt

I assured you in my last post that Where's P-Mac would never forget its roots, but some see my increased posting on GOAZCATSBLOG.com as a sign that I have given up the quest to find P-Mac.

Here is an e-mail from my friend/long-time reader/first-time caller Gould aka G-Money aka Gouldfinger aka Gouldini doubting my efforts to find Paul McPherson (for the record the e-mail was sent to another one of my friends and then forwarded to me):


All good things must come to an end. The Suns seem to be on the downside of their "great" run the past 4 years. Brett Favre retired. And now a true great explorer has also thrown in the towel on what could have been one of the greatest discoveries ever made by man. This explorer/historian must be considered amongst the greats of his field, Chris Columbus, Jacque Custo, Lewis and Clark, Indiana Jones....Justin Adler.

If you haven't (I'm sure you have) already checked out his new stuff on azcatsblog (or something like that) you should. Still classic. Not the same but still classic. Despite stating otherwise I fear this might be the beggining of the end of the ever important search for Paul McPherson.

McPherson's finding would easily have ranked amongst the greatest discoveries. Indiana finding Jesus' cup of eternal life, Columbus finding the free world Lewis and Clark (I think) mapped out a lot of the western USA and of course how could we forget the importance of Mr. Custo who...come to think of it I have no idea what Jacque Custo did, maybe something on boats, but that really doesn't matter as its overwhelmingly obvious that finding a gemstone as rare as Paul McPherson would have elevated Mr. Adler to the Mount Rushmore of explorers.

I take my 40 oz. and pour a lil out for my dead homie, that being the dream of Mr. Adler and Mr. McPherson meeting face to face, and I now take a large sip and wonder what the future holds for Where's P-mac...

Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

Available for immediate release:

TUCSON, Ariz. — Wherespmac.com has officially sold all University of Arizona-related blogs to GOAZCATSBLOG.com. Where's Paul McPherson will still update occasionally with random posts honoring silly rappers, washed-up athletes and other WPM-approved items.

WPM's primary mission will not change, as we are still very much in the hunt for Paul McPherson and anybody with any contact information is encouraged to contact Justin Adler. In other words, Fab holla back at me.

-End release-

OK, basically a while ago, I bad-mouthed the shit out of GOAZCATS.com and not everything I said was accurate to put it nicely in my favor. After ranting about GOAZCATS.com, the site's president, Jim Storey e-mailed me. Long story short, I was offered a job as their chief blogger. If I had known job opportunities were as simple as talking shit about someone, I probably would have disrespected Google or Nike.

Regardless I am definitely happy to be blogging for GOAZCATS.com as I will be gaining more readers and earning a couple of bucks never hurts either. Plus I have a lot more access and we have a lot of big ideas already planned for the new blog.

Check it all out as I have invested a lot of time in writing for their/my site and I consider it to me some of my finest work to date. GOAZCATSBLOG.com

For those of you who have been loyal Where's P-Mac fans over the year and a half I appreciate all the support and your time. I will try to update the site at least once a week, but I will definitely be blogging a couple times a week for GOAZCATSBLOG.com, so please add that to your favorites.

Also for those of you who are just craving more Justin Adler writing you can read my throw-away blog (probably a sign I have too many blogs) for my journalism class here. Again don't expect much from it as it gets no more than 20 minutes a week of work.