The following conversation took place while my cousin Brett rode the bus and sat near a homeless man decked out in a UA hat, a blue autographed Cats jersey and Cats basketball shorts. Also according to my cousin the bum had "more eyes than teeth."
Brett: Yeah
H: Oh man, I'm so excited we got Williams, we've been trying to get here forever.
B: Who is Williams?
H: She's this great volleyball player, it took us forever to get her to sign on. Did you hear about Jameson?
B: No, who's that?
H: Oh he's this 4 star diver from
B: (Not wanting to look like a douche who knows nothing about sports) Did you see that big basketball recruit practice here last weekend?
H: Oh you mean Brandon Jennings?
B: Yeah.
H: Oh my God! This is his autograph right here! (emphatically points to autograph on his jersey) I was at the practice until they kicked me out. I wasn't able to go to the open practice so I showed up to the next practice.
B: Wait, they kicked you out?
H: Yeah I couldn't make the open practice so I went into a later practice. As the cops were escorting me, I kept yelling for Brandon. He definitely wanted me to stay.
Welcome to Tucson Brandon. If you like going out in public, you might want to get used to being accosted by one-toothed bums.
If you have any ridiculous Wildcats sports stories, that can match or beat a homeless man bragging about a Brandon Jennings autograph, send them in to justinadler1@gmail.com. You won't get anything, but having "Where's P-Mac contributor" on your résumé will definitely impress any employer.
1 comments:
The sad thing is I know who this bum is. He tried to sit next to me at many a practice. And he smells like absolute shit. It's disgusting.
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