Chapter 2

I got off my air-conditioned bus and entered the absurdly-humid town of Puerto Iguazu. Somehow I lost my new best friend Thiago and was alone, sitting on a chair swatting off bugs and wondering what the hell I was doing.

I left behind a lot of nice things in Palermo. My great house, a great location, an incredible roommate who is a chef, his cool girlfriend who is studying integral theory; a field which I never understood, but allowed us to engage in some pretty heavy conversations. I even had a cute girl I was just beginning to date, who had a bizarre obsession with M.I.A. and was an Ed Cota fan. I also had my roommate Laura who I was somewhat in love with.

Now I am alone with no home. I have no routine, no Deadspin, no Slam Online, I have no clue if Aziz Ansari will be performing in a city I have never been to or if Stephon Marbury has done something Stephon Marbury-ish.

My goal is to avoid all news, sports and blogs for two months. My favorite rapper could die and I would not know about it until I return to the United States on December 15. Jesus Christ I just thought about a rapper’s death before the death of a family member or friend, maybe I need two months to myself to get my head on straight.

But really what am I hoping to achieve? I suppose I am hoping that I can push myself to the brink of insanity and that by abandoning my routine or any semblance of my former self I’ll figure out some great answer to life. Or it will at least make Jay-Z’s “Blueprint III” that much more enjoyable when it releases in December.

The next morning I woke up, hit the free breakfast and headed to the waterfalls with some friends I met the night before. My expectations were incredibly high and the falls blew them all away. It was definitely one of the most beautiful sights I had ever seen in my entire life. I managed to look down my cute Finnish friend’s shirt and see her nipple, which would normally be the highlight of the day, but the falls were still better. Which means either the falls were that amazing or her tit was that wack.

Additionally my Buenos Aires university ID knocked the park entry fee from 40 pesos to 14 pesos, so 26 pesos at a time I am making up for the 2,200 USD of wasted tuition money.

That night the lame guys who were in my hostel room the previous night left, so it was just my Finnish roommate and some cute German girl. If this were Eagle County I’d get my Kobe Bryant on, but I don’t think that is legal here.