Concert Review

Watching Cam'ron swagger on to the stage and give a performance that was even more bizarre and epic than I could imagine will forever be a defining moment in my life.

The show began with Funkmaster Flex warming up the crowd with D-Block heavy playlist. I was proud to know every lyrics to about 75 percent of the tracks that were played, but being surrounded by others who fell in the 95th percentile made me think that maybe I should not have been rocking a Phish-themed Pandora radio station all week.

The concert was scheduled to start at 9:00, but it wasn't until close to 10:30 that Cam's entourage began to trickle out, including an older, grey-haired woman who I assumed to be his mother. Finally the intro to Killa Season (the album not the movie) blared over the speakers, Cam strutted out on the stage and then broke any building momentum when he calmly asked the crowd, "What's goin' on?"

I'm still not ready to discuss Cam's outfit of a red jacket over a red tee, 3 massive chains, with the crazy Gucci visor and the red shades. Cam has effortlessly transitioned from his pink period to his purple period and is now on the red phase.

He then sped through a medley of his hits beginning with "I really mean it" and then rocking his verse on:

Dipset Anthem

Welcome to New York City

Get 'em Girls

Leave me Alone

The Roc (Just fire)

Down and out

Wet Wipes

Oh Boy

Hey Ma

Every song was solid, but I was just as excited for Cam's interludes between the songs just because every Cam quote is in its own realm of genius. Three weeks ago when asked about the possibility of a Dipset reunion on Hot 97, Cam responded, "It's like when the space shuttle took off, it ain't land on Plymouth rock, so therefore it can't have carpet."

To which the radio host, paused for a moment and then asked, "What the hell are you talking about?"

I was also hoping Cam'ron would discuss his upcoming Harlem version of "Curb your Enthusiasm."

Fortunately Cam stopped the music and broke into a story about a girl he knows who hates her job, which inspired Cam to compose the track "I hate my job."

After the song Cam returned to his story and said, "You know I was fuckin' her right," and got into a detailed description of the aforementioned sexual intercourse, before he transitioned into his new song "Bottom of the pussy."

For most people this is not a subject or song they would perform in front of their mother, but this is reason 324,523 why Cameron Giles is not most like most people.

Then Cam asked "Where my ladies at?" before informing them that he had just one question for them, of course leading up to his hit "Suck it or note" (Please note every lyric is quotable in this song). When some guy got too into the song, Cam was quick to yell "No homo, no homo" to affirm his sexuality in case there was any confusion.

Then Cam decided it would be best if he brought out his neighborhood, which entailed bringing out 25 of his friends to act as his hype men as they held bottles of Hennessey.

Cam let one of his boys Vado spit, while he took a smoke break. Vado, whose name I assumed as a West Harlem pronunciation of an East Harlem nickname, until Cam declared, "Vado, that stands for violence and drugs only." Other than an awesome acronym for a name, Vado was pretty forgettable.

Unfortunately 40 Cal (at least I assume it was 40 Cal since I can't imagine anyone else owning a chain that says 40 Cal with the diamond-made gun representing the L) never got the chance to rock the mic.

Finally Cam cycled through material from "Crime Pays," playing "Cookin' Up," "Got it for cheap," "Get it in Ohio," and ending with "Cookies and Apple Juice."

Then Cam left the building after just 45 minutes of performing. Quality over quantity I suppose. The DJ awkwardly played "Let's talk about it," building me up that Cam might come back out and by some miracle of God bring Jadakiss out, but tragically that did not happen.

Still I left the show with Crime Pays video saga promo DVD and a Crime Pays promo poster, which can now thug out my bedroom walls with my Greg Oden photo.

Check here to watch clips from the concert.

Check here to watch the single most amazing movie ever made.