justin adler, blog, buenos aires, bahia blanca, university of arizona, brooklyn, basketball, travel, paul mcpherson

Saturday, June 30, 2007

A perfect video? Wipe me Down.

I haven't done this in forever, but this couldn't be passed up. Lil Boosie and Co. are the latest Bullshit Rap Video of the Week.

  • Straight into shots of bitches. Why waste time?
  • Bragging about your tall tee. Dope.
  • How will Lil Boosie start his verse? If you guessed by spelling out "Boosie Bad Azz" on hoes' stomachs, you guessed right.
  • Please note the little kid at the 2.08 mark, I hate my parents for not putting me in ghetto-fabulous music videos at a young age.
  • Damn Webbie may outshine Lil Boosie's opening verse with his gem of: "Hot drop drop top top drop hoes drop it like its hot yea nigga im the shit." If I ever get married these are going to be my vows.
  • Also props to Webbie for the lyrical masterpiece of: "And i don't use the Lifestyle or the Magnum or the Trojan i'll go head and use the barrel of the tech." Note: This will added to the end of my vows.

Bullshit rap video scale:
Rims: 5/5
Bitches: 5/5 (I was very impressed by these hoes)
Grillin the camera: 4/5 (I threw in a few points for Foxx the side-profile grill)
Stacks of money: 10/5 (One, Lil Boosie having a stack in his mouth. Fucking Wow. Two, the little kid with the stacks at the end is precious)
Cadillacs: 3/5 (The Dodge Magnum with Lamborghini doors was nice)
Shots of your projects: 2/5 (Being in the club, projects it's all one in the same)
Guns: 0/5 (Guns would have been nice)
Drugs: 1/5 (They rhymed about purple enough)
Liquor: 0/5 (Buy the bar out already)
Bonus 20 points for WPM Lifetime Achievement Award for this:

and the first 40 seconds of this video

Total score: 50/45 (111%)

The highest score ever. Lil Boosie you are a Where's P-Mac legend. Hopefully once I get a baby mama and a kid you can teach me how to raise a child, because your parenting skills far surpass your rapping skills, which is saying, well, not that much really. Seriously though, Lil Boosie you are one of the greatest human beings ever.

A distant second but another video I wanted to recognize was Hurricane Chris' "A Bay Bay."

As always here is the chopped-n-screwed version of "Wipe me Down"


Spencer said...

Do you know if he's using the tech barrels with spermicidal jelly?