Draft Day/Sad Day 2009

Here is the 2009 WPM NBA Draft review:

• After a ridiculously long middle-of-the-night commute, I arrived at the Garden just before 6 a.m. I was unsure how early I should arrive before the tickets went on sale at 11 a.m., so I figured showing up a good five hours early would be playing it safe. I had been looking forward to attending the draft ever since I thought about moving to NYC, so I was set on doing whatever it took to attend the draft.

• There were already a good 40 people in front of me, including one kid rocking an authentic DKV Joventut Ricky jersey.

• I have never once had a nightmare where I walked naked into a public setting, but showing up to the NBA draft without a jersey was like living that nightmare for five hours. I have never felt so naked and I will never forgive myself for not bringing my D. Miles Cleveland Jersey to NYC. It would have killed.

• It was rather serene to be on the streets at such an early hour. Except there was a homeless guy 10 feet away from the line who was either rehearsing his soliloquy of Billy Madison speaking gibberish or he was just stung the fuck out. He went on for a good 30 minutes incoherently yelling at a light pole. I respected his dedication to his craft.

• There was a white guy rocking an Iguodala Sixers jersey backwards, which I believe means he's a Sixers fan in distress. Where as if you are a black guy wearing a jersey backwards it means you are Nelly in the "Tip Drill" video.

• Other dope jerseys I saw in the line: A Warriors Spree jersey, An NYC Spree jersey (I can't tell you how much I hate Gallinari fake Spree jerseys), a NYC Jamal Crawford jersey, about 500 Patrick Ewing jerseys, a dirty Bobcats warm-up jersey, and a dirtier Spanish national team Ricky jersey.

• There is a banner that hangs inside the Garden's entrance that commemorate The Liberty's (NYC's WNBA team) first home game, in which they defeated the Mercury (Phoenix's WNBA team). That one still hurts.

• I still don't understand what color the Mercury wore in their inaugural season.

• The five-hour wait was saved by a nice camping chair, a good book and a bag of pretzels. I was also entertained by the kids in front of me who spent two hours passing a notepad back and forth writing their own mock draft. It was pretty solid as every pick ended with the phrase "via trade."

• I was also allowed ample time to contemplate the absurdity of the situation. Fans will pay thousands of dollars to watch a guy throw a ball into a metal rim, hit a ball with stick of wood or any other sport you want to break down to the simplest level. But I am calling in sick to work and waiting in line for over five hours to watch kids the age of my younger brother walk across a stage and shake an old Jewish dude's hand.

• Guys from the Knicks PR street team began passing out Knicks towels and postcards encouraging fans to buy season tickets. Since there currently is no real face of the Knicks, the card had a picture from inside the Garden of the Knicks playing the Nets with the scoreboard showing the Knicks down 65-52.

• Eventually after more than five hours of waiting, which involved a fair amount of anxiety that I would not even be able to buy tickets, I got the golden ticket (15 bucks and in 6 rows deep in he highest section of the theater) and I went home to take a victory nap.

• I was awoken once from my slumber by a call from work, which I promptly ignored. Ten minutes later work called again. This time I picked up thinking they would have some trivial question to ask me. I was wrong. They called to tell me I was fired. After ending the call I began to lose my mind quite a bit. How could they do this to me on my special day and less importantly how could they do this to me on Brandon Jennings' special day.

Actually Brandon Jennings was completely removed from my mind as I began pacing back and forth in the hallway trying to calm myself down and not dwell on the shittiness of unemployment of the past and present.

Granted it was a lame office job that I hated and the pay was comically low, but it was still an income none the less. And it was a blatant attempt to try to destroy a day I had been looking forward to for years.

• I carried on with my day and returned to the Garden an hour before the draft. I sold my extra ticket for $30, which paid for my ticket and netted me an extra 15 bones, almost making up for the lost job. I tried to get a lot more for the ticket, but the market just was not there and another scalper eloquently put it, "This draft is dead, n***** don't wanna see this shit."

• Then my friend told me Michael Jackson died. More sadness.

• Finally I got in the WaMu Theater and 30 minutes later Mr. Stern took the mic and the draft began.

• 1 - The only thing worth noting from the No. 1 pick was that I did not know Tricky Ricky was on the Clippers. The same Ricky Davis who once tried to cheat his way to a triple double.

• 2 - There was a guy wearing a black Griz Darko jersey which was trill enough as it is. But he went the extra mile and safety-pinned a paper reading "Thabeet" on the back over Milicic.

• 3 - I'm actually a big James Harden fan even though I refuse to accept the Thunder (who get nastier by the minute) as a real team. His was also killing it with his suit.

• 4 - I'd guess that we are only 30 days away from learning that Tyreke never even took his SATs to get into Memphis.

• 5 - The Wolves had no choice but to pick Rubio here, even if he refuses to play for Minny.

• 6 - I was really hoping the Wolves would pick Brandon just so they could have the two in same backcourt, but they did something just as silly and picked Jonny Flynn.

• 7- When the Warriors stole Stephen Curry off the board I would describe the atmosphere inside the theater as somewhere between 9/11 and Michael Jackson's death. Word to Ochocinco.

• 8 - I think Stern just finished enunciating the J in Jordan Hill's name when Knicks fans began to boo. I booed with them because why the fuck not? When asked what I thought about Hill by a Knicks fan, I told him that Hill was a dumber A'm'ar'e Stoudemire, if that is possible. Side note: I sat in the Suns war room for the 2006 NBA Draft. I still have the official media guide which lists the top 300 players eligible for the 2006 Draft. That media guide does not include Renaldo Balkman, who the Knicks chose with their 20th pick in the '06 Draft. Few can fuck up drafts like the Knicks.

• 9 - Including Demar Derozan, I have seen 6 of the first 13 picks play in person, in case you were curious.

• 10 - Brandon Jennings. Finally the moment I have been waiting my entire life for. And he is not in the fucking building. Can this day get any fucking worse. I waited five hours in line just to say I was there when Brandon was drafted and see some ridiculous Italian suit and the motherfucker does not even show up. I am seriously depressed at this point.

• 11 through 13 - Don't matter. I sit alone in the Theater and want to cry. I plan on waiting for the Suns to fuck up the 14th pick and then bounce.

• 14 - "With the 14th pick in the 2009 NBA Draft the Phoenix Suns select Earl Clark from the University of Louisville, Clark is not in attendance tonight. (Pause) But... The Milwaukee Bucks' pick Brandon Jennings is now here," Stern declares. And like a little kid on Christmas my eyes light up and a big smile returns to my face. Brandon awkwardly comes out from behind the stage and blows kisses to the crowd and then gives a belated handshake to the Commish.

• Then the No. 13 pick Tyler Hansbrough exits through aisle next to the lunatic fans I am sitting with. Most other players receive warm cheers and high fives as they exit, but not Hansbrough. Everyone boos Psycho T as he walks by. The kid next to me, who was no bigger than me (5'9," 145) gets within 8 inches of Hansbrough's face and screams "Faggot!" at Hansbrough (6'9," 250). Many others join in and begin to loudly question his sexuality. Then one kid, appropriately enough wearing a Knicks Starbury jersey, knocks Hansbrough's draft cap off his head. He is quickly apprehended by security and escorted out of the building to chants of "MVP!" and we all offer him high fives in support of his bold act of bravery.

Brandon Jennings quickly follows and I give him a high five. Sure I don't have a job, paying rent is going to be a struggle soon and Brandon Jennings, 3 years my younger, just secured himself a contract for a couple more million on top of the $2 million he earned in Italy; but for that second all seemed right in the world.

• For the record I don't know shit about Earl Clark and I don't really care. Also when Hansbrough was drafted one fan behind me began chanting "Austin Croshere!" unfortunately nobody picked up on it.

• I was excited for the Suns to bomb the upcoming season with hopes of getting John Wall next year... Until Gould reminded me that the Suns gave away their 2010 first-round unprotected pick along with Kurt Thomas for a conditional second round pick. Enjoy that top five pick next year OKC.

• I later bumped into Bruce Pascoe, gotta respect your local Tucson beat writers.

• I bounced around the theater some more and ran into the Jennings clan. I saw a skinny kid in a nice suit with the Bucks draft cap. I yelled Brandon at him twice until I realized it was a his little brother Terrence, who if you don't know is the coolest kid in the universe and you would expect far too cool to remember meeting me multiple times before.

• A group of fans waved an Israeli flag and celebrated when Israel-born Omri Casspi was selected. Later I saw a guy wearing a shirt reading "Palestine Spyders," I would have like to see his reaction to Casspi's selection.

• The remaining fans began chanting "Jeff Van Gundy" until the former Knicks coach and current ESPN announcer acknowledged them, to which they responded with cheers. They repeated the process with Mark Jackson. And they began chanting "Bilas sucks!" God bless draft fans.

• I finally saw one of my journalism heroes Lang Whitaker in the flesh. I shouted "Hey Lang!" at him and he turned around from the media section. I told him I was a long-time Linkstigator and he gave me solid finger point of respect. If you guys understood how long and how much I have read of Lang's work you would understand how amazing that is.

• I was really, really upset that I did not run into the Stephen A. Smith Heckling Society of Gentlemen. That guy is one of my personal heroes, but on a lesser scale than Lang Whitaker.

• I stayed for the first few picks of the second round just to see the NBA Deputy Commissioner Adam Silver, who was greeted to chants of "We want Russ," in reference to Russ Granik, the former Deputy Commissioner, who announced the second round until 2006. I hope you all can appreciate how insanely hardcore these fans were.

• I left the draft in a decent mood, still a little messed up over losing my job. But if I learned anything on the day, it's that going to the draft is not about having a good time. For New Yorkers its about having your GM pick a brain-dead, raw power-forward in hopes that he will compliment a superstar you probably won't be able to sign in 2010; and leaving the theater furious as a result. And for the rest of us, it's seeing one young kid after another make more money in a night than most of us will ever see in a lifetime.

• Here are some pics I took on the day:

Young Money now a Buck.


Hansbrough before he was de-capped.

This lady was quite bizarre.


Uhhhhhhh.

Now is the time

I have not blogged about Arizona hoops in a long, long while because I considered myself beyond that phase. But now that Arizona has comically worked its way into the Sweet 16 I am bringing myself out of sports-blogging retirement and typing this post. And if you can't find the comedy in UA getting into the tournament solely off name recognition, playing two shit teams and now outlasting ASU (who has beat UA five straight times) in the tourney then you are a fucking idiot. Additionally if USC loses in a couple of hours, then UA will be the last Pac-10 team in the tourney.

Now in honor of the Cats, President Obama and Jordan Hill who has somehow became a lottery pick, I am going to re-run my interview with Jordan Hill from last summer.

**********
At Lute Olson’s Team Camp I caught up with Jordan Hill to talk about the life and times of J. Hill. I figured Jordan has dealt with enough questions regarding the drama of Arizona basketball, so we talked about the easier subjects of politics, Weezy, Jeezy and baseball.

ME: How excited are you about Barack Obama winning the democratic nomination?

JORDAN HILL: Umm. I mean I'm not no politician, so I don't really know nothing about that.

ME: Are you gonna vote?

HILL: Nah, I'm just gonna leave it to the professionals, I don't know what's going on. I ain't looking at no CNN, no kinda news to see what's going on, so I ain't gonna vote. I bet you that most of the people voting out there are just voting for Obama 'cause he's black.

ME: Isn't it your dream to win a championship and go to the White House and present the No. 1 Arizona jersey to a black president?

HILL: (laughs) I mean I wouldn't mind seeing that, but it's my point of view that he's not going to be there for a minute. That's how I feel.

ME: What do you mean by that?

HILL: (says nothing and shrugs)

ME: You think he's gonna get shot?

HILL: Hey, hey. Sorry man, I just don't think he's gonna be there for a while.

ME: I guess you should worry about winning a championship before we worry about who’s in the White House.

HILL: Yeah we gotta win that championship first.

ME: With oil hitting $134 a barrel and the whole living green movement, what's Jordan Hill doing to save the environment?

HILL: I haven't been recycling. I don't recycle. I litter, I'm trying to cut back on that though.

ME: What's up with your car, I haven't seen it, but I hear it's pretty crazy.

HILL: It's getting painted, I get it back next week. It's an '82 Cutlass. I put 22s on it. I'm getting it painted white and blue, two-tone style to match the interior. The bottom is gonna be navy blue and the top is gonna be pearl white. It was just all white before.

ME: So does that classify as a donk. I'm not from the South, what is your definition of a donk?

HILL: It's big rims and the car is sitting up high. My car is lifted, so I guess it's a donk.

ME: Have you listened to The Carter III yet?

HILL: Yep. Lil Wayne, he's a good rapper, but he's not the best. I listen to my boy Jeezy. Jeezy is the best rapper.

ME: So you graduated Thug Motivation 101 and 102?

HILL: You already know. I waiting on his next one to come out, I don't know when, but it's coming.

ME: Aside from not recycling and listening to Young Jeezy, what else have you been doing this summer?

HILL: I'm taking summer school, pre-session and summer I.

ME: Anything else that most people don't know about you?

HILL: I'm really interested in baseball, before basketball I was a baseball player. I'm a Braves fan.

ME: I know you're pretty inked up, do all the tattoos have meaning because I've heard after the first one they get more and more meaningless.

HILL: No they all have value, except this one (points to flaming basketball on his left tricep). I don't know why I got that.

ME: Alright Jordan thanks for your time. Enjoy the rest of your summer.

HILL: Thanks man.

After the interview I asked Jordan for a photo, so I could have a fresh picture to throw at the top of the blog. Jordan asked if I’d be in it. I told him I just needed a picture of him, but he refused to be in the picture without me and was very persistent about me being in the photo. So eventually I rolled with it and there you have it… Again props to Jordan for being so cool and living up to the hype of being the funniest guy on the team.

Odds and ends

Can we just give this man the White House already? If the Heisman wasn't enough, check ESPN's special on Air Jordans. ESPN interviews experts like Jordan Brand designer Tinker Hatfield, famed director Spike Lee, former SLAM editor-at-large Scoop Jackson and Barack Obama.

In case you're curious, all I am looking for in president is a young, basketball-playing, Desmond Howard posing, Jordan wearing man.

On to other people who will greatly affect my life in 2009, not bad stats for future-Cat Brandon Jennings.

Meanwhile former Cat Mustafa Shakur seems to be having the time of his life in Poland.

"Um...Mr. Livengood, Could I...have that money...back? I accidentally choked this guy unconscious and I need pretty much everything I got for my lawyers right now."

There's really no better way to style your hair than having fresh Shane Battier cornrows smoothly transition into a mohawk.

Way old news, but something I completely missed in 2007 was UPS removing left-turns from their delivery routes. This just blows my mind for some reason.

Back to the present, I really like what Stanford is doing off the gymnastics mat.

I'm contemplating planning a trip to New York just to see some Asian gun powder art and have my mind blown by this exhibit.

Yes I do feel much better about myself after killing 30 minutes on the New York Times version of YouTube compared to the real YouTube.

If Mos Def didn't produce "Black on both sides" and he wasn't one half of Blackstar, I would have a lot of questions for the man. The first being why are you acting in a movie where you work in a VHS cassette rental shop with your buddy being an accidentally-magnetized Jack Black, who accidentally erases all the cassettes in the shop.

Zona Zoo...lame

Dear Zona Zoo,

Your e-mails are completely worthless. Please stop sending me a million e-mails telling me when I can line up for the game. I will continue to get there 45 minutes before tip-off and continue to be complacent with mediocre seats.

Just because the team (outside of Bayless) let down the entire school against ASU, doesn't mean you have to push Thursday's Cal game extra hard. If Chase Budinger and Jordan Hill aren't going to show up for the game, why the fuck should we.

Please note that during football season it would take a lot more than a free Chipolte burritto for me to support any program Mike Stoops' name is attached to.

Figure out how to get your ticket system working and please leave me alone.

If you want to see how a real student section is run, refer to Oregon's Pit Crew. Please review their brilliant listserv.

Hey Everyone,

So here’s the deal. In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, the theme of Thursday’s UW game is “Happy Valentine’s Day Ryan Appleby.” I didn’t want to send a message out too early in the week, as we want this to be a complete shock to him. That’s also why we’ve been telling reporters all week that Thursday will be really bad, because we wanted them to fuel the fire and make Appleby think this year will be like last year. What happened last year is old news, so lets create something that will be remembered for the right reasons. We don't want to be like the Washington students and do the same old, dumb stuff every year.

This is a great opportunity for us, as a group, to show how creative we actually are. Make giant Valentines day cards for him, write poems, dress up in your finest attire; we want this to be something special! It’s the last thing he and his teammates will be expecting, and the more we can throw him off, the better. The best/funniest Valentines card, addressed to Appleby, will win a pair of NIKEiD Oregon Shox courtesy of NIKEiD.com. Sign it “from AB” or "Aaron" if you want, but be creative and keep the content and slogans funny, not malicious. We will collect the best cards and give them to him after the game. Ryan’s girlfriend will also, reportedly, be at the game and we will present her with flowers before the tip-off (if she makes an appearance.)

Ya, I realize UW is a Rival, I hate the school as much as everyone else, but lets get this done and make the reporters who’ve been writing all this garbage about the Pit Crew lately look silly. That means during the game as well, don’t chant “Applebitch” or anything like that, it’s old and frankly, quite dumb. Cheer for the Ducks, and if it's having an effect, cheer for Ryan as well throughout the game.

Can you dig it?!

No, not really. Definitely not now at least.

(not my genius, credit Niketalk)

Yesterday as Shaq to Phoenix rumors started swirling, I thought nothing of it. There is no way Shaq is coming to Phoenix, If the Suns couldn't pull KG, who was begging to come to Phoenix, how are we going to now get Shaq. More importantly why the fuck would we want Shaq. It's not the early 00s or whatever you call the period from 2000-2005, it's 2008. Last time I checked Shaq was a shell of his former self, on the injured list and on the worst team (9-37) in the league.

Last night I was still in a delusional state hoping this was another retarded trade deadline rumor a la the rumor of Portland giving up Jarrett Jack, Travis Outlaw and Channing Frye for Devin Harris in a Jason Kidd trade. I joked I'd rather trade Shawn Marion straight up for Devin Harris for two reasons: one, Devin Harris is not 52 years old, two, he is not owed $40 million over the next two years (that one is not an exaggeration).

More of angry, pissed off Justin's thoughts:

We might as well see if we can trade for a 2001 version of Allan Houston, so we can officially have the worst bang for the buck of all time. Seriously though, worst case scenario, the Suns can Allan Houston Rule Shaq.

If we are going to trade our second-best player, I'd rather have anybody not named Kwame instead of Shaq.

As much of a constant bitch Shawn Marion, he still fit the Suns offense better than anybody in the league, period.

Why not just keep Kurt Thomas, who the Suns traded to Seattle to save a little over $8 million. Seriously Kurt averaged 4.6 points and 5.7 boards in 67 games for the Suns last year. This season he's 7.3 and 8.9 and has played 38 games for the Sonics. Shaq put up 17.3 and 7.4 in only 40 games for the Heat in '07 and was averaging 14.2 and 7.8 in 32 games for the Heat this season. Yes Shaq's numbers are better but are they $12 a season better?

What the fuck is Steve Kerr doing?!

Justin's coping-with-it thoughts on the Shaq trade:

First and foremost, Shawn, you were never happy being an all-star, playing along side two all-stars on a championship caliber team, while getting paid a max contract. You're now on the worst team in the NBA, a team which already lost 15 straight games this season. Suck a dick and a half bitch (c) E-40.

Honestly we were never going to win a championship with the team we had, not unless the rest of the west caught the Black Plague, any change is good, I guess.

It is Shaq, at least he'll be entertaining.

Maybe proving the world wrong and keeping Kobe from ever getting another ring will be all the motivation he needs.

We no longer have Marcus Banks. That's just great.


In other horrible basketball news, Where's P-Mac's prodigal son, Nic Wise may be out for the season after knee surgery to repair a torn meniscus. This sucks in more ways than I'm able to comprehend right now, the only silver lining is Nic's Facebook status which reads: "Nic Wise Had surgery. P.S. USC & UCLA i gave you buckets with a torn meniscus."

On a positive note, if you follow Philly women's prep hoops like I do this article is a must-read. Or if you just want to learn about the Tarnowski hoops history.

Just use the barrel of the tech

The future of SC

The red-hot Wildcats at the red-hot Trojans. Just how excited was I for this game? Well I completely ignored the Lost season premiere, so I was pretty fucking zoned in on this game.

• Early on SC is stroking tough shot after tough shot. A really impressive shooting display, too bad I'm actually going for Zona.
• 10:30 Bayless' alley-oop was clean. Almost as clean as the camera man zooming in on his Nike Air Zoom BBs.
• Throughout the season there have been spurts where I have forgotten Jawann was even on the team. Part of it has to do with all the attention focused on Budinger and Bayless, but the other part is because Jawann has the quietest game of any of the starters. He does a million and one things for UA, but half the time it's easy to forget he is even on the floor. It was great to see him hit three 3s in the first 8 minutes of the game.
• It's amazing that O.J. Mayo is simply beasting on Bayless and the Cats are still winning.
• Jawann McClellan, again God bless. The blocks, the put-backs, the all-out hustle. A great senior basketball player. You're a hero. No I don't think I have ever said anything this nice about a Wildcat not named Nic Wise.
• When they panned to Alex Jacobsen on the bench it literally took me 20 seconds to realize who it was. Alex looks like a stunt double for Kirk Walters, who is little more than a stunt double for incompetence.
• I love the way the announcers are giving love to Oregon's Pit Crew, by far the most g'd up student section in the Pac-10, if not nation. I've been meaning to note the briliance of the Pit Crew's last listserv e-mail for the UCLA game which had this genius passage:
• As most of you know, Lake Oswego's Lamest, Kevin Love, will be making his return trip to Oregon. His father, who once played basketball at Oregon, had the following to say about Ernie Kent after Kevin chose UCLA, "It wasn't us that blew it, they blew it. They destroyed that program." If placing four first round draft picks in the NBA is blowing it, I guess coach Kent has done just that during his tenure. Stan has been very critical of the program and the University he graduated from in the past few years. Lets greet these two with the welcome they deserve, and let Stan know that he's no longer a Duck; he's a traitor. Thursday's game is Nationally televised and will be broadcast on Fox Sports Network at 7:30. If you have time, give Kevin a call, text, or send him a picture; his cell phone number is 503-961-3265...and don't forget ucla is an Adidas school.
• Also props to FSN for two straight Bob Elliott-less broadcasts. I hope he caught whatever Dickie V had or just got finally got carpal tunnel from filling the screen with worthless telestration.
• Final: 80-69, Zona. Budinger 29 and 8 boards, McClellan 23 and 8 boards, O.J. Mayo 23, 4 dimes, and 5 boards.

Sneaker Watch: I am in love with all of SC's Air Zoom BBs. Shame on UA for not wearing black shoes on the road, what the fuck is going on?

Other stuff not related to the game:

Greatest moment in Al Jefferson history:

Looks as if Al Jefferson is just as quick with his wit as he is on his feet.

When Kevin Garnett emphatically reminded Jefferson of his all-star selections - "11 years! 11 years!" - Jefferson replied with something that Garnett couldn't top.

"I told him we both have one thing in common - no championships," Jefferson said. "He didn't like that too much."

If I, God forbid, was a Nets fan this would worry me a lot more than Jason Kidd skipping town. Dancing to Soulja Boy, very suspect. Dancing to Soulja Boy with all dudes, mad suspect.

RBK's train of thought...hmm...black people like sneakers, black people like Kool-Aid...Brilliant! It's like they got Mitt Romney doing the R&D.

I watched only a little of tonight's Democratic debate because this already made up my mind, but I saw enough to see that Jason Alexander was in attendance. Why didn't George get to ask any questions?

Washington wrap-up

Here's the delayed wrap-up of Thursday's Wildcats' upset of No. 6 Washington State

What you need to know:
Arizona hit 12-21 (57%) shots from 3-point land to defeat Washington State 76-64, handing the Cougars only their second loss of the season. Bayless had 23, Budinger had 22, pretty much any time that happens the Cats should win. The Cats lead the entire second half and almost the entire game as they held Kyle Weaver to 15 points and Derrick Low to 5 points.

What you don't really need to know:

• It was Zona's first home game since their Jan. 5 loss to Oregon and their first time playing in front of a fully-loaded Zona Zoo -which was depleted by winter break - since the Nov. 28 match-up against Cal State Fullerton.
• Officially it was rally-towel night as the entire McKale waved the towels in the air throughout the game. Unofficially, I declared it Petey Pablo night. Either way it got Jordan Hill excited. "They had those towels waving around, and we're really fired up," Hill said. "We got fired up with them tonight."
• Not worth noting: "Who am I?! Petey Pablo motherfucker!!" If you are going to be a 3-hit wonder, there's no better way to start a song.
• Worth noting: Hill didn't pick up a foul until midway though the second half, opposed to his normal style of picking up two fouls during pre-game lay-ups drills.
• Props to UA for ditching Kanye West's wildly over-played "Stronger" for the intro video and rolling with some lame-ass song I've never heard of. I'm still not sure how, but some how it makes it all less cheesy.
• I love Derrick Low. No homo.
• Kirk Walters checks in at the 12:30 mark of the first half. I take the under on a bet that he plays less than 2 minutes. He comes out at 10:05. Lost by 25 seconds. Dammit.

Saturday's game:
Washington at Arizona

What you need to know:
Arizona shot 70% in the first half and 62% overall to beat Washington State 84-69. Bayless 26, Budinger 25, yeah that'll do it. Each hit 5 threes, Budinger in 10 shots, Bayless in 6! If Bayless didn't have 2 fouls early on, the Cats could've hit 100. Ryan Appleby is a douchebag, yes that is something you need to know. Next week's road games at USC and UCLA should be great games.

What you don't really need to know:

• Even though I had tickets, I chose to watch this game at home solely because I didn't feel like standing up for two hours or moving the mile from my apartment to the McKale Center. I never claimed to be a die-hard Cats fan.
• I almost regretted it as the UNC and Maryland women's hoops game went into double OT causing fans at home to miss most of the first half.
• As I laid on my couch in sweatpants eating frozen pizza, I realized I made the right call.
• Never a close game. If the Cats are able to keep playing at this amazing pace, people will call the Washington State game a turning point.
  

Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Game: Honestly, Nic Wise is just too good to have silly moments of the game. No longer do fans clinch when he has the ball, knowing something retarded is just around the corner. Coaches and fans alike are now confident when the rock is in his hands as he's matured into a solid point guard. In other words, he sold the fuck out on the WPMNWOTG.

Sneaker Watch: I think Kamyron Brown was wearing Birthday Lebron Vs against UCLA and Tajuan Porter rocked Seattle-edition Air Jordan XX2s.

Fallin'

Agent Zero is out for the season. Bayless has been hurt. Mike Stoops is still the football head coach. ASU basketball is hot. Life can't get much worse for a UA fan.

A high from an Arrested Development marathon is the only thing keeping me remotely sane right now.

I wasn't expecting UA to win tonight and I had already accepted a loss days before the game started. Then I started watching the game and UA didn't look half-bad. The Cats lead by 12, I was reminded that UA had won 24 of the last 25 games against ASU and ASU's last win against the Cats was Jan. 23, 2002.

There is no way the Cats are going to lose this game. They lead what seemed like the whole fucking game, but to quote the great HOV, "you're tumbling, it's humbling, you're falling, you're mumbling/Under your breath like you knew this day was coming."

A loss to ASU.

Damn, gravity's ill.

I put the loss solely on Chase Budinger's shoulders. He looked good early on doing it all for UA as he hit 9 of UA's first 11 points. Then pulled the greatest disappearing act since Houdini for the rest of the night.

Let me see if I have this right. You're the reigning Pac-10 Freshman of the Year. It's your team. You're gearing up for the NBA next year. Shouldn't you take over the game at some point? Shouldn't you maybe take more than 5 shots in the second half?

Chase's second half stats: 5 points on 1-5 shooting (all from 3), 2 defensive boards. Wow.

I have no formal coaching experience, hell outside of giving the ball to Tracy McGrady every possession in NBA 2k2, I have no coaching experience at all. Still, I think it might have been a good idea for Chase to...hmm...DRIVE THE FUCK INSIDE or find his shot some where. I know ASU plays a solid zone, but UA's second half offense went as follows: four passes around the perimeter then settle for a bad 3 or dump it low to Jordan Hill. Every time.

Chase's overtime performance was equally impressive with his only shot being an off-balance, desperation 3 with 4 seconds on the clock, which clanked off the rim.

Chase second-half performance reminded me of my own play when I'm the worst player on a team at the rec. Stand around the perimeter and as soon as I catch the ball pass it back. But there's a big difference between an out-of-shape blogger and a team leader looking to go to the NBA.

A few quick notes:

• Remember last year when Jawann McClellen would take and hit 3s? What happened to those days?
• Zane Johnson meet the court.
• After Zane's 3 which hit the top of the backboard it might be a good idea to return to the comfort of the bench and shoot the shit with Kirk Walters.
• I can't even get into Bob Elliot tonight, but I hope he catches whatever Dickie V has.
• Solid return by UA after the embarrassing loss to Oregon on Saturday.

Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Game: I hope it went something like this post game, "Chase how the fuck does the point guard only take 2 less shots than you? What the fuck were you doing out there?"

Final thoughts: When does softball season start again?

Good 'ol Duck blogging

As I do with all bad news related to my favorite teams, I've been sweeping Oregon's lackluster season under the blog rug. I figured that if I never mentioned the losses to St. Mary's, Nebraska, Oakland and ASU maybe the NCAA will forget about them too.

I also should thank my friends for not murdering me via text message, Facebook wall post or blogger comments after all those ridiculous losses. You're all much better people than me, because the big man up above (Christopher Wallace) knows I would never let that kind of failure go under the rug if my friends' teams were falling.

I really don't even know what to make of Oregon's shitty start to the season. As Bruce Pascoe points out here, all the numbers indicate they're fine, except for the only numbers that count. I haven't been reading The Oregonian as much as I should be, but I'm assuming John Hunt & Co. are pointing to a possible sophomore slump for Tajuan Porter, Joevan's injury or how huge Aaron Brooks really was. That or nobody gives a fuck since the Blazers are red hot.

Anyways here's the notes from today's UO at UA game, one of the games where I say I don't really care who wins, but I freak out every time Oregon hits a big shot and by the end of the game I'm going all-out for the Ducks.

• Nic Wise is starting. Tajuan Porter is not. I'm no doctor, but I am pretty sure at some point Nic might stole some of Tajuan's powers in a technique not seen since the Monstars stole Sir Charles' powers.
• At the 16:10 mark Jawann flew out of no where and blocked the shit out of Maarty Leunen, Jawann then flew into the base of the hoop. I thought for sure the 83-year-old McClellen would be out 6-8 months, but miraculously he got up and continued to play.
• When Chase Budinger's shot is on...Damn it's just beautiful. Regardless of how many buckets he hits I don't need to see his parents' reaction to every UA possession. Thanks FSN.
• I should throw it out there that I would have gone to this game if it were not part of UA's Holiday Package. I know it makes perfect economical sense to the ticketing department and Tucson locals, but it screws broke UA students.
• I would kill to be in a billiards class with Bryce Taylor and Malik Hairston.
• Who is that left-handed guy who just hit a shot for the Cats? Fendi-something...I am pretty sure most people forget he was on the roster.
• How bizarre is it that Warcraft now sponsors in-game stats?
• Yes I am loving every minute of Oregon's first-half 27-8 run.
• No I don't like seeing Tajuan Porter try to do too much with the ball then settling for a bad shot. His whole style of play is based on shots that need to go in or he looks like the dumbest guy on the court.
• Wow the Cats' weakside D, is just wow...Miserable.
• First half Ducks lead 48-37, shooting 60% from the field and 7-12 from deep. First-half pros: Oregon's shooting, transition game and quick shots inside. Cons: I ran out of ice cream and was forced to downgrade to Cheez-Its as an in-game snack.
• Honestly a huge halftime lunch knocked me out for the first 8 minutes of the second half. Where's P-Mac, Coverage you can count on.
• Cats got it close but Malik Hairston and the Ducks were just too much. Nice bounce-back win 84-74, Ducks.

Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Game: I haven't done this in a while and in that 'while' Nic has been lighting it up, including his career-high 17 points Thursday against OSU. However today's WPMNWOTG is Nic's side-of-the-backboard clank with 40 seconds left in the game. After being wide open after a pump-fake Nic set himself up for 3 from the corner and hit straight rubber padding. Weights.

Sneaker Watch: Being at home and not having HD hurts. What also hurts is boring-ass team shoes, which almost, ALMOST make me miss Staf and Marcus Williams...Props to Tajuan on his UO Huarache 2k6s...Everyone else step your game up, it's not like you have to pay for them.

Randomness: OK I don't really read as much as I should, but this book based on 'what if's' got me thinking... What if LeBron went college, he would have murdered everyone right? Who the fuck would have stopped him? I don't see how he would have lost. Ever. They probably would have had to take some of John Wooden's 1960s and 70s wins away and gave them to Bron, just as a token of respect. Obviously we'll never know, but a 20-year R.I.P to Pistol Pete who didn't do bad for himself at LSU in his 3-year career there, averaging 44.2 ppg.

Can't hardly wait

The Brandon Jennings-led Oak Hill Academy played in the McKale Center tonight...jumping straight into it..

• Who ever puts on UA events should be ashamed of themselves. I was more excited for this high school basketball game than any Cats game this whole season, enough so that I got there a whole 30 minutes early (I know it's not much, but I like strolling in right at game time). As I got to the game there were two massive lines outside McKale one a wristband which admitted you into the game and one to get into the game. Why not let those who paid simply walk in to the event? I have no fucking clue. Also a belated 'fuck you' for the mess that was the UA alumni game, which was also a ticketing mess.
  
• Fortunately I got in before the game and was able to score third row center court seats, not too shabby (c) Adam Sandler. Good enough to get this shot with my camera phone.
• Spotted Jawann McClellan wearing a dumbass angry snowman tee. Someone should let Jawann know it's no longer 2004 and he's not Young Jeezy.
• By the way the Cats edged out San Diego State today 74-58 in a game that was much closer than that score.
• Brandon Jennings stood out from the Jordan Brand-sponsored Oak Hill with his black/red XIs. Filthy.
• The game was the first part of the GoAZCats.com Showdown, which featured a bullshit Tucson basketball game after the Oak Hill game, that's basically the equivalent of Jay-Z opening for Grime (a shitty Tucson rapper nobody listens to).
• Jennings hit the first bucket of the game with a deep, deep 3 that barely moved the net.
• Later on in the first quarter Jennings was coming up the court yelling "Iso! Iso!" while his coach was trying to call another play. He's just that cold.
• In the second quarter Jennings stroked a long 3, steals the next possession, then spins to the basket for a tough lay-up. He casually bops upcourt looking up at all players' points. 22 points with 5 minutes left in the second quarter. No big deal.
• Jennings finished the first half with 26, as Oak Hill led James B. Dudley(NC) 55-42.
• He continued to put on a show in the second half netting 3s with ease all the while looking like he was barely trying. He never went for a defensive rebound, played a 'casual' defense and usually never went inside the perimeter on offense, he just stood around the 3-point line calling for the ball, then getting it and effortlessly wetting 3s.
• It should be noted that Brandon Jennings' favorite class at Oak Hill is lunch.
• Oak Hill's starting center Keith "Tiny" Gallon is a 6'9'' 300 lb beast who had a defender on the floor for five minutes after he tried to take a charge. The man is massive to say the least.
  
• After it was all said in done, Jennings had 49!! after playing all 32 minutes of the game. Oak Hill won 102-91.
• He won the bullshit MVP award, which as one of my friends noted, "He would've got if he scored 15 points."
• After the game the local media swarmed the high school senior. Crazy fucking attention for an 18-year-old.
• 

Random Shit:
How did Chuck Hayes get to the NBA doing this?
Where are they now? J.P. Prince putting up numbers for Tennessee.
God damn sailing captains always showing their tits.

Cats at Illini

Arizona at Illinois...well pretty much at Illinois
Mini-recap:

UA came out like shit...Woke up...Actually Chase snoozed through the whole game...Nic Wise continued to be a beast...After I bashed him last week, Jordan Hill played a hell of a game...Cats win in OT 78-72.

Notes:

• What the fuck is up with Jawann McClellen shaving a "5" in the back of his head. First, it looks completely retarded, second do you need same numeral 18 inches from the 5 on the back of your jersey? Don't get me wrong I love some good art on the back of heads, word to Anthony Mason and Ron Artest, but hair art is something where you either go all out or keep the blade down, no in between. Jamelle Horne I see you too.
• Not related to UA hoops in any way, but I need to throw out this excerpt from the LA Times article:
• Ellerbe pointed to Mayweather's crossover potential by relaying a story about Halloween at the boxer's home. After his childhood of scaled-back Halloweens, Mayweather made three trips to the grocery store to stock up on candy bars for kids in his gated Las Vegas neighborhood. He gave away so many that the children who'd seen him on "Cribs" basked in his generosity by urging him to "make it rain" Snickers, a nod to his public cash displays.
• How the hell does Chase Budinger go the entire regulation without a field goal? Find your fucking shot. I still can't figure out, how a team leader can go a game without a field goal.

Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Game: The moment of the game goes to ESPN's announcing crew for sucking Nic's dick throughout the game. "He's the spark plug of the entire team!" "He has such incredible quickness." "His defense is like a cobra strike!" "Another beautiful dime dropped by Nic." Plus many more I forgot, in addition to the lame "He's so wise" puns.

Sneaker Watch: Bayless going from the Lebron Vs in the first half to the Air Jordan Concord XIs in the second half, way to pay homage to the building that Mike built.

Why you all aggie?

Truthfully I wasn't even going to post anything about tonight's UA/Texas A&M game. Posting game recaps isn't really my steez any more, even if it was the part of the foundation this blog was built upon.

Then fourth quarter I thought to myself "Y'all don't know my expenses, I gotta buy a bigger place and more baggies, why you all aggie?" from Jay-Z's "Heart of the city." And that's pretty much the only reason I'm recapping this game, because there is a dope Jay-Z line that goes with it.

If I ever was a sports editor, I'd make all my writers lead with lines from Jay-Z and if they ever submitted anything from "Kingdom Come" or any of the "Best of Both Worlds," I'd fire them. Overcoming a 20-point lead to win by 11. Not nearly as important as something Jay-Z said six years ago.

On to the game...

• Kirk Walter started. That's about all you can say about Kirk tonight he started. His box score has more O's than Hov's kitchen in '88, except for the 4 fouls and 2 turnovers he picked up in 8 minutes of action.
• Chase Budinger was on again, but for some reason coach O'Neill loves keeping him on the bench for crucial stretches of the game.
• Nic Wise actually played a solid game, for the first time since...well ever.
• Bayless is really sick, putting up a season high 26 (off 12 shots, he went 10-10 from the line), but I still don't see how he'll be a one-and-done player. He's not NBA sick, yet at least.
• The fans started to go crazy as UA turned the game around at the 12 min mark in the second half. A huge part of me was scared the Zona Zoo would embarrass UA and rush the court for a No. 9 upset. Thank God they didn't
• Jordan Hill sucks. A lot. People love him because he dunks, has braids and is always at every party in Tucson. But at the end of the day he can barely play D and has a basketball IQ that's less than his age. Give me Bret Brielmaier any day of the week.
• Cats comeback and win 78-67, giving the Aggies their first loss of the season.

Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Game: Nic played well, what else can I say? Plus the comparison below should be enough comedy for tonight.

Sneaker Watch: Jerryd Bayless and Jawann McClellan wearing the white/navy blue Lebron Vs...Everybody else step your game up.

In the music

Every holiday season I try to take a break from hip-hop and listen to Christmas music the entire time. I figure it can't be healthy to numb your brain with Weezy 12 months a year and a little Nat King Cole or Sinatra never hurts. Every year it gets harder and harder though as every one of my favorite rappers releases an album hoping it will sell a couple more in the retail propelled quarter 4.

Here's a quick rundown of what I've been bumping when Christmas music isn't running through my headphones.

1. Lupe Fiasco's single "Superstar"

A bootleg concert version of this came out late in the summer and I slept on it for a couple of months. Since the real version has been available I can't stop listening to this song, seriously I've listened this song at least twice a day for the past two weeks. By far the best single to come out in '07 not off "American Gangster" or "Graduation." Lupe again kills the track with flawless lyricism. Props to Hype Williams for making a perfect video to accompany the song.

2. Freeway's "Free at last"

Freeway is by far my favorite Sunni Muslim rapper from Philadelphia. Even though this album isn't as great as his debut "Philadelphia Freeway," the inner Sunni-Muslim-rapper that I believe is inside us all won't let me make any negative comments about this album. Freeway is hard as shit, but also keeps it real such as in the track title "I cry," where he raps "I'm a break it down to y'all a few times in my life when I had to cry/ it's just grown-man shit/ real rap, let's go/ when I was diaper switching/ first time my GI Joes was missing."

3. Birdman featuring everyone - "100 million dollars"

The scene where Weezy is rapping in a room made of money is just epic. When I make it one day, I am going to say Weezy keeping stacks on the blades of his ceiling fan was my inspiration.

4. Murs releasing a video off his two-year old "Murray's Revenge" when he supposedly has a new album dropping early '08.

I say this about half the people I meet in life, but honestly Murs might be my favorite person ever. Definitely top 5 dead or alive and that's just off a couple LPs and a dope concert.

5. The retarded amount of good music that leaked in the past few days that I haven't even got a chance to listen to fully.
Styles P - "Super Gangster, Extraordinary Gentleman"
DJ Drama a.k.a. Barak O'Drama - "Gangsta Grillz (the album)"
Wu Tang Clan - "8 Diagrams"
Ghostface Killah - "Big Doe Rehab"
Murs 3:16 Presents: "Murs and the Misadventures of Nova Express"
Beanie Sigel - "The Solution"

6. Jay-Z - "American Gangster"

One of the better albums to come out in my lifetime. Enough said.

7. Snoop Dogg - "Sensual Seduction"

Snoop Dogg - Sensual Seduction [EXCLU]
Uploaded by PeteRock

Snoop Dogg may be the flyest person ever. The idea of making a P-Funk inspired video in grainy resolution 15 years into your career in the year 2007 is simply genius. Also props on cutting the middle-man that is T-Pain and just using a voice box himself.

Other shit:
Magazine I'm most anticipating: "I'm a martian and if you understand me than you're Jesus Christ" Props to Marc Ecko for knowing how to sell a goddamn magazine.

Random Cats shit: Reasons I haven't blogged the past two games
1. When you don't want to be a sports journalist, it's tough to find motivation
2. I figure everyone watched the Kansas game
3. Work that actually pays me, unlike journalism
4. I try to like the Cats, I really do, but there is not one player on the team who I really enjoy watching or have an invested interest in
5. Some other shit, namely apathy and homework

Best thing I've heard about the Cats recently: "We should start a Facebook group called 'Brielmaier from 15!!!'" - in reference to UA walk-on Bret Brielmaier jumper (with a wide-open lane) with 5 seconds on the clock against Kansas.

Random Oregon shit: They had a game tonight against K-State that was nationally televised. I took a nap between the first quarter and :45 second mark in OT, effectively missing the whole game...But they won, so I can't complain. Notes: Catron had 15 in the second half...Freshman Cameron Brown spells his name Kamyron Brown...Ernie Kent is a G...Oregon already gave away Adrian Stelly's #21 to freshman Nicholas Fearn...

Random Shot at the ol' J.O.B.: This ether I laid in the comment section of an article that made a mockery of journalism. No offense to Ritter, his side was legit.

Sneaker Watch of Life: I saw a bum today wearing Soaps, the shoes that are designed aggressive freestyle walking.

Coming up on Wherespmac.com: Review of favorite X-mas tracks and albums. Be ready.

Schwartz in Kansas

Where's P-Mac proudly presents the writing of the Daily Wildcat's Michael Schwartz. Schwartz is the greatest sports writer in Tucson, hands down in my opinion and he continues to produce the only readable material in the Daily Wildcat.

Schwartz is also the biggest sports fan I know, demonstrating this by knowing all of Paul McPherson's stats off the top of his head and willing to continue the impoverished dream of being a sports journalist. He's a die-hard D-Backs and Suns fan and he's quick to snap, "You're an idiot," if you disagree with his views. Oddly enough, nothing makes me happier than Schwartz telling me how wrong I am, then giving me a million stats to back up his reasoning. Without further ado...

LAWRENCE, Kan. – With an ESPN-televised so-called showdown against Arizona on tap the next day for its No. 4 Jayhawks, the city of Lawrence, would normally be caught up in basketball fever.

After all, Kansas football fans often look forward to basketball season even sooner than Wildcat fans.

But that was certainly not the case Saturday when the No. 2 Jayhawk football team played with a chance to take over the No. 1 spot in the nation and move one game away from the BCS Championship Game with a win over its hated rival, No. 4 Missouri.

For those of you unaware of the Border Showdown, it’s the second-oldest rivalry in college football with more hatred spewing from a Jayhawk to a Tiger than from a Wildcat to a Sun Devil.

The streets in Lawrence appeared empty as if it were 2 a.m. when kickoff approached just after 7 p.m. local time, with the entire city indoors watching the game. (That, and the fact that the weather was absolutely freezing).

At The Hawk, a popular bar in Lawrence, the establishment only gave out wristbands between plays so nobody would miss any of the action. Every person in the place intently watched the game – even the girls – cheering their Jayhawks on every snap as if they were attending the game.

Some people showed their hatred for Missouri with “Muck Fizzou” shirts, and the bar played the Kansas fight song at halftime.

Over at Jefferson’s Restaurant, the unofficial hangout for Kansas students, fans packed the place wearing Kansas blue and red, cheering every play even louder than at The Hawk. Cardboard faces of Kansas’s hefty head coach Mark Mangino dotted the restaurant, where dollars bills, some with pro-KU sayings, covered the walls.

The game did not go quite how Jayhawk fans would have liked, with Kansas dropping a 36-28 decision, but it was not for lack of effort from the fans on the home front.

With under a minute left, Jayhawk supporters roared for a third-down stop and cheered emphatically when the Tigers could not convert a first down. That only led to language typical of the UA student section after Missouri forced a safety on Kansas’ first play of its next drive to seal the KU defeat.

While Kansas fans mourn their football team’s missed opportunity at a chance at a national title – as this would be worse than ASU eliminating Arizona from bowl contention again next week – they can certainly take solace in the bread and butter of the school, a No. 4-ranked basketball team that has Final Four talent and Elite Eight experience from last season.

Those fans should be ready to take out their anger on the Wildcats by game time Sunday night.

More tidbits from Lawrence
I ran into ESPN analyst Jay Bilas Saturday while he shopped at the Allen Fieldhouse gift shop. Bilas, who is calling Sunday’s game for ESPN, predicted a close contest.

UA video and recruiting coordinator Matt Brase walked into Jefferson’s with a couple of team managers in the fourth quarter in all of their Arizona gear, but they were not openly rooting for either football team.

One person apparently ready for basketball season at Jefferson’s wore a shirt that said “Why play with Roy when we can play with our Self,” in reference to men’s basketball head coach Bill Self and former head coach Roy Williams.

(Schwartz is in no way an official writer for Where's P-Mac, content stolen from here, with Schwartz's approval)

UMKC at UA

My first real game of the season. A real thriller as the Mid-Con/Summit league's University of Missouri Kansas City paid a visit to McKale to play the Lute-less Cats.

• Watching UMKC warm-up I notice they only have three black players on their team. If you doesn't murder them, this will be an embarrassment.
• No Weezy, but UA now plays a little pre-game Daft Punk. Respect.
  
• It's close all the way throughout the first half UMKC is actually leading at the 7-minute mark, 18-16. Keep in mind only one black dude started.
  
• After a quick run, UA goes into the second half, up 37-29. Although 9 first half turnovers and allowing 7 offensive boards made the first half almost unbearable to watch.
• UA finally wakes up 20 minutes into the game. Hitting 3s, getting boards, and playing with a little energy for a change of pace. All UA in the second half.
• Final 81-62. The Cats are back above .500, 2-1 baby!! Bring on Adams State.

Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Game: Up 17 with 2:56 to go in the game, UMKC is taking the ball out of bounds with 8 seconds on the shot clock. Coach O'Neill brings in defensive specialist Nic Wise to make sure the UMKC Kangaroos don't bring this game any closer. As the shotclock expires, UMKC forces an off-balance deep 3-pointer from the top of the arc. Whistle, foul, 1-3, white. 3 at the line. Utterly incredible.

Sneaker Watch: This is where Mustafa and Marcus' departure hurts the team the most. Hate 'em or love 'em they always had nice kicks. Only thing worth mentioning in Monday night's game was Jawann's white/blue Huarache 2K4s. Raja would be proud. (By the way wasn't it always love it or hate before the Game/50 song. I swear to god they changed around the order of that saying. Maybe I'm just crazy)

Louis Nap Sack Where I hold'n all the Work at Moment of the Game: To the security guard who let bring in a nap sack full of Goldfish (that's just how real I keep it) after one of the other guards wanted me to throw them away. "To throw away that many Goldfish would be a crime," he said. I could agree more.

Some Links

Need a time-out you probably shouldn't be taking. Here's some articles and videos that are probably more entertaining than your homework.

First, an update in Agent Zero, err, Hibachi, err, Nacho's blog.

This is why I love the NBA. Melo and AI bringing new meaning to the mile high city.

I always knew they had a chance.

Incredible piano medley of Kanye's Graduation.

I am not the best journalist in the world, in fact I'm not even sure I'm a journalist at all any more, but I'm gonna go ahead and give the WPM Lamest Lead Ever Award to this trash. Come on now Lance, step your game up.

I have driven through Casa Grande a million times. I never knew there was a massive Fritos factory there. Respect on the green chips.

Every time I read an article on Google, I get more and more excited for the day they take over the world.

"When it comes to awareness of the stock price, they say, Google is different from other large high-tech companies where they have worked, like Microsoft, where the day’s stock price is a fixture on many people’s computer screens.

At Google, the sensibility is more nuanced, they say. “It isn’t considered ‘Googley’ to check the stock price (which hovers in the high $600s),” said an engineer, using the Google jargon for what is acceptable in the company’s culture. As a result, there is a bold insistence, at least on the surface, that the stock price does not matter, said the engineer, who did not want to be named because it is considered unseemly to discuss the price."

Hopefully Google can one day do something about Saudi rape victims receiving 200 lashes.

Still don't think Google can ever help Mustafa Shakur's game. Congrats on signing on to a club in Poland.

Finally Marcus Williams, who was widely hated by every athlete on campus for being a self-obsessed dick, is finally getting his. After being drafted in the second round and cut by the San Antonio Spurs, Marcus was recently cut by the NBA D-League's Austin Toros. I didn't even know you could get cut from a D-League squad.

In Virginia, we smirked at that Simpson trial

The first official game notes of the season are going to be short and sweet, mainly because I wasn't at the game, but I caught enough of it to throw these notes down.

• Despite interim/permanent Coach O'Neill's request to deny Virginia any 3s. UVA hit them at will, often with nobody on them, giving them an early lead in the first half. Fast forward to the final minute of the game.
• 45 seconds: Sean Singletary busts Jordan Hills ankles with a crossover, Singletary then pulls up, and they're ain't shit for UA to do but look. Re-up, re-locate, re-off them brooks. 73-69, UVA. Next play Jerryd Bayless gets gully for a freshman and hits a deep 3 in the biggest game in his young career to put UA within 1, 73-72 with 28 seconds on the clock.
• Coach O'Neill's alleged cut-throat defense finally works and UA forces a 5-second violation as UVA tries to inbound the ball.
• What happened to that boy? Bayless gets ungully as freshman and makes a stupid mistake as he tries to catch the deep inbound pass, as he tries to prevent a back-court violation he passes the ball directly to UVA's Adrian Joeseph, who is quickly intentionally fouled.
• Joseph calmly sinks 2 at the line to put UVA up 75-72.
• Zona had a chance but ended up fucking it up horribly with 28 seconds to run a play.
• Virginia wins 75-72. Somewhere Pusha T and Malice are happy.

Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Game: With 6:13 left in the second quarter and UA down by 3, Nic pulls a jumper from the top of the key, completely out of any rhythm of the offense. The result? Straight air homey. I guess you could chalk it up to nervous jitters, which makes a lot of sense in the second game of the regular season in your sophomore year.

Sneaker Watch: Coming soon.

That's a lot of Starburys

My most sincere apologies for the 14-day Where's P-Mac drought, not sponsored by The Empire. I was on strike with the writers guild until I realized that I never was getting paid in the first place and I'm not part of any guilds.

I was actually in New York City promoting Where's P-Mac East, and by promoting I mean scribbling Wherespmac.com on the walls of NYU's dorm halls. While I was there I did get to witness what may be Stephon Marbury's last game as a Knick.

I went to the World's Most Famous Arena Sunday night to watch the Knicks play the Heat, who are still waiting for D-Wade to get up for the eighth time. I was pumped to see Stephon Marbury, one of my favorite players ever, in action. Unfortunately Jason Williams owned Steph the whole night, getting steals, hitting game winners and forcing Steph to take a horrible shot as the clock expired. Miami ended up winning their first game of the season 75-72.

Since then Steph has vanished into thin air. Not playing in the Tuesday's loss to the Suns and now threatening to snitch on Freaky Zekey.

"Isiah has to start me," Marbury fumed, according to the source. "I've got so much (stuff) on Isiah and he knows it. He thinks he can (get) me. But I'll (get) him first. You have no idea what I know."

Since two of the leagues craziest people are involved, nobody knows what's going to happen, but Steph has already been fined $180,000 or 12,016 pairs of Starburys.

On to the college game. UA has got off to a stellar start edging out a garbage Northern Arizona by 7 points in their opening game. I missed the game, but according to every report, it was an underwhelming effort by Zona.

Bad news: The Lumberjacks shot 50 percent from the field in the second half and stayed in the game despite shooting 19 fewer free throws. The Cats were only up 3 with 52 seconds left. Jordan Hill fouled out and the other big men got handled by Big-Sky-caliber big men. Jerryd Bayless is not Gilbert Arenas.

Good news: The season is still pretty young and the Cats got the win.

Better news: Brandon Jennings officially signed on. The same Brandon Jennings who appears on the latest SLAM presents PUNKS cover.

Greg Hansen has been brutally honest on UA sports all year and he's not stopping for hoops.

Early contender for Where's P-Mac Nic Wise Moment of the Season: In a feature in Sunday's Daily Star hoops season preview Nic Wise (now a sophomore) listed English 101 as his toughest class this semester. Seriously Nic? English 101 is your toughest class in your sophomore year? The C.A.T.S. program must work miracles with these kids' schedules. Honorable mention goes to senior Jawann McClellen for listing Celtic Spiritualism as his toughest class.

Other items of importance:

A new DJ Khaled video for the "I'm so hood remix" with Busta Rhymes wearing 100 chains.

I don't even watch the shit any more but great quote from Family Guy creator Seth MacFarlane, "It would just be a colossal dick move if they did that," regarding making shows without his writing or voice.

Great example of drugs ruining a rap career.

Great example of drugs ruining a rapper, then the said rapper realizes he's now mentally retarded, rolls with it and makes it work.

Umm...Ok.

Finally I can't make Saturday's UA game versus Virginia. If anybody out there wants to write some notes on the game for the site get at me (jadler1@email.arizona.edu). You won't make a dime, but your e-street cred will go through the roof.