I covered some more minor league baseball last night as I did a little freelance work for the Sacramento Bee. Here's the article I wrote on the Sacramento Rivercats clinching the Pacific Coast South Division. I don't know why you would read it because even I don't give a fuck about that.
The highlight of the game was walking toward the locker room after the game and inhaling the aroma of shitty champagne from 20 feet outside the room. Even though it's only Triple-A baseball it was still kinda cool to be in a locker room as they spray champagne and beer all over each other. I even got my fair share as some no-name yelled "Hey we're celebrating here!" before blasting me with champagne.
Granted it was nothing like Dame Dash pouring Cristal on Brazilian models atop one of the most stuntastic yachts of all time, but one should never need an excuse to run a picture of Dame Dash dousing bitches in Cris.
Where's P-Mac ramblings about Dame Dash of the week: About two years ago Roc-A-Fella Records co-founder Dame Dash had a reality show on BET called "Ultimate Hustler." The show was a blatant rip-off of "The Apprentice," except Dame substituted for Donald Trump. Before Dame would eliminate any contestant, he would give this speech talking about how when you die on your gravestone it reads "birth date 'dash' death date" and how what's important in life is what you do with the 'dash.' I guess any speech with the word
'dash' in it worked for Dame. Sidenote: Dame once kicked a guy off the show for being a quote, "bum-ass n*gga."
Fast forward a year later, after Dame's show fizzled off the air, I'm at the unveiling of my grandfather's gravestone (in the Jewish religion, it goes burial, wait 11 months, unveil the gravestone, or something close to that). Point of the story is the rabbi gave the exact same speech Dame Dash always delivered and I thought to myself, "Wow. I can't believe this rabbi is an 'Ultimate Hustler' fan."
Oh, and just for the fuck of it here is another sample from the never-quite-was Where's P-Mac comic strip (click to enlarge):